


a lily perhaps

by gglow



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Florist!Niall, M/M, Multi, insecure!louis, older!harry, painter!harry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-06
Updated: 2017-04-06
Packaged: 2018-10-15 09:54:46
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 19,801
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10554350
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/gglow/pseuds/gglow
Summary: ”He was trying to chat you up wasn’t he?” Niall said, sorting old receipts from under the counter. Louis turned to him and the thorn of the rose stung his finger. He hastily put the flower in the vase and brought his finger to his lips.”Who? Harry?” He asked, wiping his finger on his trousers. Was Harry trying to chat him up? But why? He was probably a trillion years older than Louis, clearly wealthier and a hell of a lot better looking. Louis was just an assistant at a florist’s.✿✿✿OR the one where Louis works for Niall and somehow gets seduced by his friend Harry Styles. It wasn't written in the stars or anything.





	

**Author's Note:**

> good GOd it took me a LONG time to publish this piece. i think this will be my last larry fanfic so i won't be bothering you with them anymore lmao
> 
> anyway i hope you enjoy this one, please feel free to comment! this work hasn't been proofread by anyone besides me so if you see any inconsistencies please let me know :)
> 
> standard disclaimers apply: first and foremost the fact that english isn't my mother tongue. also this story is a pure work of fiction and is not about real life events, i do not know the people personally etc etc
> 
> edit: in my head louis is 19 years old in this and harry is 26 :)
> 
> have fun reading x

✿✿✿

 

It wasn’t written in the stars or anything - or if it was Louis would have to figure out a way to thank them somehow. It wasn’t a pure accident either, maybe it was fate or just good luck that set things in motion.

 

Do you ever wonder how even little tiny choices can lead up to things that wouldn’t have happened if you had chosen otherwise? A one great big thing almost didn’t happen to Louis, when he was contemplating whether or not seek a trainee’s job from a florist’s.

 

See, if he hadn’t called the shop about the job, Niall Horan wouldn’t have hired him, and he never would have met Harry Styles. It all just sort of happened, starting from Louis’ thumb pressing the ”Call” button, to the point where he was sweeping the floors and arranging flowerpots on a perfectly normal Monday…

 

Niall was organizing some paperwork on the counter, eyebrows furrowed, getting a little bit of ink on his lip for chewing the ballpoint pen, his foot tapping the ground. The weather was cloudy but still on the warm side. The store was quietly blooming in all its magnificence. Louis didn’t think he’d ever get used to it.

 

It was a quiet day, Niall said almost all Mondays were quiet. He’d had Louis unload the mold bags and the fertilizers, and right now Louis was gathering the last orchid seed bags from the cardboard box on the floor.

 

He was just about to slide into the back room, when he heard the front door’s bell ring. He was already in motion, but saw a tall figure step into the store; long curly hair, limbs like a gazelle, dressed in all black. He looked like the guy one didn’t want to pick a fight with. The type of guy everyone knows but doesn’t _know._ But he was attractive, Louis would give him that. Frankly, he was fucking hot. His expression was a little bit dark, so Louis quickly snuck into the backroom to avoid all contact.

 

Louis almost ran into a shelf full of flowerpots escaping the social situation, but managed to avoid the catastrophe and laid the seed bags on the table. When he started to search for the place for the orchid seeds, he tried to eavesdrop the conversation going on in the front of the store.

 

”Harry! Haven’t seen you in here for a while, how’s it going mate?” Niall was clearly happy to see the guy, it was difficult to imagine them being friends. Louis read the tags on the boxes, trying to find ”O”.

 

”Hi, Niall. Nothing much, lacking some inspiration I suppose. You?” The guy’s, Harry’s, voice was so deep that Louis almost pissed himself hearing it for the first time. The words were slow and soft. He actually ceased his motion just to mouth _bloody hell._

 

”Same old same old, so what can I get ya?” There was smile in Niall’s voice as Louis found the box for orchid seeds.

 

”Um, dunno, what would you recommend? Frankly I’ve managed to kill all my fancy plants,” Harry answered with a chuckle and Louis tried to keep himself busy so that Niall wouldn’t make him go to the front. He wouldn’t want to confront the tall good looking man with a raspy voice.

 

”Um, yeah that’s a bit problematic. How would you feel about some cacti? A bit harder to kill, those,” Niall suggested, and to his utterly miserable misfortune Louis found himself staring at those cacti.

 

”Brilliant,” Louis heard Harry say and he knew he was finished. If the ground could possibly swallow him right now it’d be great.

 

”Louis! Can you find the cacti?” Niall raised his voice at him and then continued to Harry, ”I have a new assistant nowadays, the old one was rubbish, but this one’s much more… perky.”

 

_Perky!_ Louis rolled his eyes at the comment. He could almost hear Harry nodding and shook his head to himself. He squeezed his eyes shut, dropping his head before answering, ”Yeah!”

 

”Would you bring one with the white flower and one with the multiple red ones,” Niall’s voice got closer and Louis stood straight, hastily picking up two pots and turning towards the door. He took a deep breath before walking through the doorway and setting them on the counter. He could feel the man’s eyes on him, so he decided to face the stare. He would fear no man.

 

Except maybe this one. He would definitely fear this one. He was so much more attractive up close, hair curling on his shoulders, pink lips parted, green eyes searching something from Louis’ face. He was so breathtaking, he was the kind of person you look and think _wow your life must be so easy when you look like that._ Louis thought his jaw might’ve dropped a bit.

 

Niall cleared his throat and Louis snapped out of it. He blinked and looked at Niall, who was glaring at Harry. _Glaring!_

 

”Anyway, I think you have better chances with keeping these ones alive,” Niall said, spinning the pots slowly on the stone counter.

 

”Perfect, I’ll have those,” Harry said, looking at Niall and then at Louis. He flashed a white smile and there were _dimples._ Louis didn’t know if he wanted Harry to visit more often or never again. It would be really difficult to keep his head in the game. (The High School Musical song started tickling in his brain.)

 

”Splendid! Louis, would you mind?” Niall said, moving away from the register, and Louis was praying that he wouldn’t mess this up as Niall started packing the cacti. He checked the price chart and tapped the numbers in, pressed a few more buttons and told Harry the price (which, in fact, was outrageous).

 

Harry pulled out his wallet and paid _in cash_. Louis would have to take a break after this. He felt Harry’s eyes on him, as he worked the cash register and handed him the change. Harry thanked, looking straight at Louis, he was so– so _intense._ Eyebrows lowered just a little, eyes locked with Louis’.

 

Niall put the receipt in the paper bag, which he handed on to Harry. They said thank yous and goodbyes and then Harry was off.

 

✿✿✿

 

Harry came back a few days later. Niall was in the back, and Louis had had the ultimate honor of making a flower arrangement to the center of the boutique, so that was what he was doing, when Harry walked in. He had the same skinny jeans on, but was now wearing a loose pale shirt with a flower pattern, a straw hat on his curls and a Burberry bag in his hand. _Oh._

 

Louis could feel his face flashing red and almost swung a sunflower pot to the ground. Harry looked at him and smiled. Louis was afraid Harry would hear his heart racing.

 

”Hello,” he said, looking straight at Louis. His voice was lower than Louis had remembered, and his green eyes forced Louis to look back at them and not anywhere else.

 

”Uhm, hello,” Louis answered and felt like a fucking child doing everything for the first time - wrong. He felt out of place somehow, and frankly it was affecting his customer service skills.

 

”Louis, right?” Harry continued, eyes now scanning Louis’ face and hair. If Louis wouldn’t have been so tensed up he probably would’ve noticed the slight nervousness in Harry’s essence.

 

”Yeah,” Louis answered quite breathlessly, not being able to look away from Harry. He blinked several times and forced himself to look at the white lily he was holding.

 

”That’s looking good,” Harry nodded towards the unfinished arrangement, ”Maybe a little more roses?”

 

Louis was just about to say thanks when Niall emerged from the back, loud as ever, ”Harry! Thought I heard a familiar voice there, killed those cacti already?”

 

Louis had turned to look at the arrangement, and was now trying to hide his blushing smirk. Niall was definitely one of the best people he had ever met. A little too loud but always in the right place at the right time. Harry let out a laugh and Louis felt warm inside.

 

”No, um, I was just wondering if they need, like, fertilizer or something,” Harry’s clothes made a noise as he rubbed his neck with his hand. He was standing in the middle of the floor somewhat awkwardly.

 

”Are you turning into a green thumb, Styles? Yeah, I can get you some fertilizer,” Niall shook his head and made his way to the back. _Harry Styles,_ that’s a porn star name right there, Louis thought, as he carried a pot of white roses into the arrangement.

 

”So, uhm, how have you liked working here?” Louis heard Harry’s voice and turned to look at him, carefully holding a rose between his fingers. His tongue felt like lead and his mouth was dry. He tried to swallow imperceptibly before answering.

 

”I like it, yeah. I’m not much with flowers, really, but– they’re very pretty,” he tried to nod casually and turned to place the rose in the nearest vase. He bit his lip nervously and tried to look like he was evaluating his work, even though he hardly saw anything.

 

”Yeah, yeah… Niall has kept the place really neat. Not a very punctilious chap otherwise, though,” Harry nodded back and scanned the whole place: the high white ceiling and the chandeliers hanging from it, the colorful flower arrangements circling the walls. Everything was top-notch.

 

”Oh,” was all Louis managed to say – he didn’t know Niall so well. He tried to be polite and friendly, but had a feeling it didn’t work out so well.

 

”What’s your favorite flower?” The question caught Louis off-guard and he jerked his head up to look at Harry in the eye. Harry was looking at him observantly, like he was trying to gather information.

 

”Oh, uhm, I think…” Louis tried to look around at all the flowers whose name he didn’t know, ”A lily? Perhaps, haven’t really thought about it,” he shrugged and nodded, as the final confirmation. Lilies were pretty, yeah.

 

Harry nodded back, and looked like he tried to figure out what to say next, when Niall came back, ”Here’s your fertilizer, Hazza,” he waved a green plastic bottle in the air before putting it on the counter.

 

”Ah, thanks mate,” Harry walked up to the counter, leaving Louis to stand by himself, feeling like an idiot. He decided to sneak to the back to get some more roses, as Harry had suggested, to avoid any more awkwardness.

 

After Harry had gone, Louis came out of the back room carrying a vase of roses, trying to look like nothing had happened. Niall was leaning onto the counter and eyeing Louis as he sticked more roses into the arrangement.

 

”He was trying to chat you up wasn’t he?” Niall said, sorting old receipts from under the counter. Louis turned to him and the thorn of the rose stung his finger. He hastily put the flower in the vase and brought his finger to his lips.

 

”Who? Harry?” He asked, wiping his finger on his trousers. _Was_ Harry trying to chat him up? But why? He was probably a trillion years older than Louis, clearly wealthier and a hell of a lot better looking. Louis was just an assistant at a florist’s.

 

”Yes Harry, he was already looking at you that way the last time and he certainly isn’t going to use that fertilizer he came for. I was just wondering if he tried anything,” Niall shrugged and looked smug. Harry had been looking at Louis in a specific way? How? Louis actually shouldn’t care, anyway wasn’t it kind of gross to get attention from a much older guy? Still, he felt his cheeks heating up.

 

”No, I mean I don’t think so. He asked what my favorite flowers was,” Louis shrugged too and looked at Niall, before adjusting a few flowers at the top of the arrangement. Niall raised his eyebrows at him.

 

”He asked you what your favorite flo- okay. Listen, um, Harry’s kind of a free spirit and I love him for that of course, he’s one of my best mates. But if you feel uncomfortable, he can take a hint to just, y’know,” Niall put the receipts away and Louis couldn’t pretend to evaluate the flower arrangement anymore, and turned to Niall.

 

”Is he… like–” Louis hated himself for asking, and he felt like a discriminating white suburb mom, but he had to know. Niall, however, interrupted him.

 

”A mini spooner?” Louis furrowed his eyebrows at the euphemism. ”A tootie fruitie? A marshmallow matey? A honey nut scooter?” Niall tilted his head and looked at the empty counter, ”I dunno, and it’s none of my business, really. He himself knows the best, but if I had to bet I’d say he’s into you.”

 

Louis swallowed and slowly walked up to the counter, biting his lip, ”But what would he want of me? I mean, we’re completely different, you know that,” Niall raised his head to look at Louis.

 

”I don’t think Harry sees it that way. Clearly he sees something in you, and I can understand that, ’cause I can see it too,” Louis squinted his eyes at Niall, as though he wouldn’t be his boss. ”Don’t worry you’re not my type anyway, but Harry, he– he’s a good man and I think anyone would be lucky to have him,” Niall’s eyes were really blue as Louis listened to him. He nodded in return.

 

”He’s really attractive,” Louis had to admit, blushing. At that moment, Niall wasn’t really his boss, but his friend. Niall laughed out loud, his laugh was contagious and happy. Louis smiled at that.

 

”Yeah, you got that right, mate,” Niall smirked wide, and Louis kept smiling. He turned back to the flower arrangement and just as he was going to return to work, he heard Niall ask, ”What did you say?” He turned to look at him.

 

”Say? When?”

 

”When Harry asked you what your favorite flower was, what did you say? Which flower?” Why did this matter? Louis blinked and answered, ”Lily.”

 

”Good choice,” Niall said simply and disappeared into the back room.

 

✿✿✿

 

A couple of weeks later Harry ran out of excuses to swing by the shop and clearly he and Niall had some kind of a vibe there, which led Niall to disappear to the back with a flimsy excuse, leaving Louis and Harry alone.

 

”So– um… I was thinking if you’d like to… uh… have dinner with me sometime?” Harry’s words crawled out of his mouth slowly, like he had weighed every single one before speaking them. Louis kind of knew what was coming, but his cheeks were still red and his heart pounding. He simultaneously loved and hated the situation he was in; he thought Harry was attractive and nice and everything, but he was just so much _older_ than Louis.

 

Despite all of it, Louis somehow heard himself say yes and the look on Harry’s face was all he needed to see to realize that he was utterly and completely fucked. His dimples, his eyes and his pink lips were more than enough to convince anyone to do anything for this man.

 

And so they went on a date. Harry showed up at his doorstep wearing a silk shirt with the three top buttons open and a bouquet of lilies in his hand. His hair was gorgeous and his smell was lovely and Louis thought that he had never met a person like this before.

 

And Harry took him to a nice restaurant and told Louis how pretty he looked and told stories about his sister who was a teacher and stories about his mother and quoted Edgar Allan Poe and talked about things no one ever talked about like how he loved libraries and Amy Winehouse and how great the muffins were at a bakery he used to work in and asked Louis questions and actually listened to what he had to say and in the middle of all that they missed the movie they were gonna catch, but at the end of the night neither of them really cared and Louis thought he was a little bit in love.

 

✿✿✿

 

On the second date (yes, there was a second date and hopefully a third and a fourth and so on, because Louis thought that he might never actually meet a person like this ever again) Harry appeared to pick Louis up with an all-black Harley-Davidson Sportster. He was so stunning in his black leather jacket and biker boots that Louis was utterly dumbfounded seeing him. And under all the gear he was still the same library-and-amy-winehouse-loving Harry.

 

This time they went to see a football game. Doncaster Rovers vs. Peterborough United. Louis had tried to get tickets to that game but had had no money to spend at the time and by his first paycheck the tickets were all gone. So he was so excited he almost ignored Harry completely. But Harry didn’t seem to mind, he was just looking at Louis fondly and smiling the whole time. And Louis thanked him probably a billion times and every time Harry just said _It’s nothing, really. I got these tickets from a friend._ Later on it turned out that Harry’s friend was not only the goalkeeper but actually Louis’ favorite player in Doncaster Rovers, Nick Grimshaw.

 

After the game they got to meet him and Harry introduced Louis to Nick, who said _A friend of Harry’s is a friend of mine_ before signing Louis’ arm and taking a picture with him. And at that moment Louis couldn’t even care about the thing Harry had told him where Nick was actually Harry’s ex-boyfriend. After that Harry brought Louis back home – flushed, hair messy and buzzing with energy. He told Harry that even though that was his second date ever it was also his best date ever and then he kissed his cheek and Harry looked at him like he had just gotten the world. And Louis swore he had never been happier in his entire life and that there would definitely be a third date.

 

✿✿✿

 

Louis wasn’t saying they were dating or anything, but this was the third time in a week they had met, so like they were kind of dating. Right now they were sitting in a quiet café chatting about this and that.

 

”So, a painter, huh?” Louis smiled and raised the cup to his lips. He was measuring Harry’s face with his eyes and took a light sip of the tea, ”What’s it like?” Harry blushed, good. He was so beautiful.

 

”Um, yeah, actually. S’great, y’know… only– you don’t make a lot of money out of it,” Harry shrugged and smiled shyly. Louis could tell he really liked painting, only if he himself had had any type of art skills at all.

 

”If it isn’t profitable how are you driving a motorcycle like that?” Louis asked, but felt like he had crossed some kind of a line between politeness and being nosey. He blushed, ”Sorry, I mean–”

 

”No, it’s okay,” Harry shook his head smiling, ”It’s all heritage, kind of the reason I’m painting instead of having a real job,” Harry chuckled and sipped his tea.

 

”Oh, don’t say that. Painting is a real job, I think,” Louis reached out to touch Harry’s hand gently. Harry’s head jerked up to look at Louis and Louis imagined what Harry’s lips would taste like.

 

Harry frowned and cleared his throat, ”But you have a real job and that’s really cool,” Harry’s smile was twinkling to life, as he carefully took Louis’ hand to his own. Louis’ brain got a little fuzzy so he just tried to concentrate on how small his hand looked in Harry’s huge palm. That palm could touch Louis all over–

 

Harry cleared his throat again before Louis got in too deep, ”Yeah, no, um, actually. I mean yeah it’s okay, having Niall around and all, he’s really cool,” he blinked and moved his eyes from their hands to Harry’s face, ”And it’s alright when you come visit,” a grin spread to his face.

 

Harry’s crooked smile was wide as he returned Louis’ gaze. They couldn’t stop grinning and the moment grew in the small table of a small café, until Louis had to look away, a raging blush on his face.

 

”Would you want to see my studio?” Harry asked suddenly. Louis blinked and nodded before he realized what he was saying, ”Um, yeah, okay, sure, yeah,” he said thinking about how a simple _I’d like that_ would have sufficed and wondered why he couldn’t be cool around Harry. They grabbed their helmets and took off.

 

✿✿✿

 

Harry closed the door behind Louis and the sound echoed in the tall room. It was more of a hall, to be honest; the walls were all grey and uncoated, so was the floor. There were windows near the ceiling, letting in the natural light and the copper ceiling lamps hung low on the ends of the black power cables. Very grunge.

 

There was a long wooden table positioned next to the wall on Louis’ left hand side. There was an electric kettle, a teapot, and packs of noodles on it. Next to it there was a smaller table and two white chairs on both sides. It looked like some kind of a kitchen. There were paintings hung up all around the walls: big, small, colorful, abstract – everything. On Louis’ right hand side there was a brown weary-looking couch, next to an almost empty bookshelf. There were blank canvases stacked against it.

 

But what really caught Louis’ attention was the bed in the middle of the room; the only thing that looked comfortable in this god-forsaken chaos. The big, puffy bed was on a white carpet, filled with lots of big pillows and a white blanket. In the middle of all the grunge minimalism it looked like a little piece of heaven. Louis wanted to sleep in it, even if he wasn’t tired.

 

”Cat! Goose!” Harry shouted to the empty apartment as he took Louis’ coat (what a gentleman) and put it on a hanger.

 

”You have pets?” Louis raised his eyebrows at him. Harry didn’t quite come out as a person who would take his dog in a dog show to prance around. Or maybe he was exactly like that.

 

”Of course I do,” Harry frowned at Louis like it would be an insane idea to even think he didn’t have pets. Louis heard little feet tapping from around the corner.

 

”And do they have actual names, too?” Louis asked, amused. Harry clearly didn’t understand the comedy in the situation, he looked at Louis funny.

 

”Those are their names,” he answered, and Louis was just about to open his mouth, when a loud bleat came from behind him. He jumped and turned around so quickly Harry had to grab his shoulder to keep his balance.

 

In front of him there was a goat, and next to it, closer to the ground, a duck. The goat was white with some brown and black patches, looking at Louis with interest. It had a beard. The duck just tripped along on the spot, looking both at Harry and Louis, and cawed.

 

Louis heart was in his throat as he stuttered, ”A goat, and a duck.” Harry’s hand on his shoulder was warm and calming.

 

”A goat and a duck,” Harry said far less hesitantly as he dropped down to his knees to pet the goat and to pick up the duck.

 

”Which one is which?” Louis asked, still staring at the goat.

 

”This one is Goose,” Harry said, gently stroking the duck with the grain, or is it with the feather? ”And that’s Cat, it’s shortened from Princess Catherine,” Harry said with a neutral expression.

 

”She has a beard,” Louis repeated his thoughts, still staring at the animal’s blank eyes.

 

”Indeed she has, I like to braid it sometimes.”

 

Louis couldn’t hold back his grin and let out a little laugh, as he carefully stroked the goat’s head. It blew some warm air in his palm and bleated again. The look Harry gave him was endearing and made Louis’ heart race. He tried to hide his blush by turning back to Cat, who nudged Harry softly before walking away. Goose jumped to freedom from Harry’s arms and followed Cat.

 

”You have a goat and a duck as pets, and you named them Cat and Goose,” Louis tried to clear his brain as he watched the animals go.

 

”Yeah, yeah I did,” Harry’s voice was full of pride and Louis turned to look at him. Harry had swiped his curls behind his right ear, and his green eyes were shimmering. “Goose has a bit of an ego there, at first I thought I should name him Dog but…, Goose sounded more appropriate.”

 

”I think that’s lovely,” Louis smiled at him, and something in Harry’s appearance relaxed. He smiled back at Louis and gave a look around his apartment.

 

Louis carefully started walking around the flat, looking at all the paintings on the walls. Some of them were made with beautiful accuracy, others with exploding passion, and some of them he didn’t find much value in, but was sure that they held in some massive backstory. He liked most of them, but could understand why they weren’t accepted in any galleries; there was no one pattern or a theme. They were impossible to put into one space and make it look like fine art.

 

Louis stopped in front of three paintings still on the wooden easels, ”Hey, this one looks familiar, do I know this?” He referred to the first painting; there was green and yellow and white everywhere, forming some sort of a shape. He turned to Harry, who was just walking over to him.

 

”Quite possibly,” he said and looked a little bit uneasy.

 

It took a few more seconds for Louis’ brain to click: ”Is this the- is this the flower arrangement I was making a few weeks back, the one you told me to put more roses into.”

 

”Yeah,” Harry was looking at the painting. Suddenly he seemed tense again.

 

”But… how could you remember all the color details?” Louis frowned and looked at Harry questioningly.

 

”I uh- I started painting it when I got back,” Harry glanced at Louis before staring at his boots, blushing. _Oh._

 

It seemed so awkward for Harry that Louis decided to change the subject and pointed at the other painting next to the flower arrangement. It was more abstract; it was painted using only blue colors, the different blues swirled around each other, they found their way around and on top of the curls and formed a fascinating never-ending whirl of blue continuum. It reminded Louis a bit of Van Gogh’s _Starry Night._

 

”So, um, what’s this about?” Louis stepped a little bit closer to the painting, to follow the path of the ice swirl.

 

Harry started to look very uncomfortable and ashamed, shifting his weight from one leg to another, looking like he wanted to leave.

 

”Sorry, don’t answer that, if that’s something personal I’m sorry,” Louis touched Harry’s arm gently.

 

”No, it’s okay that’s- uh, that’s… your eyes,” Harry’s voice was barely audible, rough and quiet. His eyes were traveling on everything but Louis or the painting. His blush deepened and he blinked at the wall.

 

”My-” Louis felt the blush rising from his neck. He bit his lip and turned to the painting. He could see the similarities, but could never understand how Harry could see his eyes so beautifully. They were just eyes for god’s sake.

 

Harry was shifting nervously, he twiddled the hem of his black and white stripe blouse. His brown leather boots were weary and he was kicking his right boot with his left foot. It was silent, Louis could hear an ambulance in the distance, the far away noise of traffic.

 

The silence was getting so loud Louis stuffed his hands in his back pockets and nodded at the last painting. When the other painting was just blue, this one was just different reds. Red stripes traveled across the canvas in curves. They weren’t swirling, just staying still, gently moving with the others. Some curves were thinner or wider than the others. Cherry, rose, raspberry colors. Traveling on and on.

 

”And that?” Louis asked and didn’t even realize how really very close Harry was, until he gave him a glance. Harry was measuring the canvas with his eyes, before he started examining his boots again. The chocolate curls fell to cover his reddened face as he mumbled, ”That’s your… lips.”

 

Louis could feel his jaw drop a little, lips parting as his eyes swung back to the painting. His already fast pulse started racing, red reaching his face. He moved to look back at Harry, who was just standing there, hands in his front pockets, hair covering his embarrassed expression.

 

There was so much adrenalin going through Louis right now that he felt like he could do anything. His heart was racing and he was afraid to move in the fear that he would start to shake. Harry had made two paintings about _him._ Harry had thought about _Louis_ \- about his eyes and _his lips_ when he was painting. Harry thought about Louis so much he had painted about him. Louis had inspired him to paint. Louis was Harry’s muse. _Louis was Harry’s muse._

 

He was so overwhelmed, he felt waves of hot and cold back to back, Harry standing so close his curls almost swept over Louis. He felt the heat radiating from Harry’s body like a bonfire. He _was_ the fire. Suddenly every single excuse he had had about not being with Harry seemed pointless and vague. Carefully Louis lifted both his hands to sweep Harry’s curls behind his ears and held his face gently. He truly had never done this before and if it had been an any other situation, he probably wouldn’t have had the courage to do it.

 

He tiptoed to kiss Harry’s cheek. It smelled like cinnamon and coffee and _Harry._ He felt his little stubble, his jawline running under his palm, curls tangled in his fingers. Harry turned his head just a little to Louis direction as he pulled away.

 

Louis heart beat faster than ever. He was looking at Harry’s shimmering eyes, his pink plump lips, his overall surprised expression, which was so infinitely endearing. Louis wanted to kiss him so bad. And so he did.

 

He pulled Harry into a kiss and met his parted lips halfway. He might have made a small whimper, but didn’t have the capacity to be ashamed right now. His fingers travelled in Harry’s hair and he pressed himself against him.

 

Harry inhaled sharply and wrapped his arms around Louis to pull him into the kiss. It felt like all the tension that had built up between them unraveled right then. It tasted like Harry and Harry again. Louis licked into his mouth and Harry stroked his back. Of all the paintings in the room Louis felt like they were the greatest masterpiece. Corny as shit right.

 

A few moments later he pulled back and Harry’s head dropped into his neck, pulling Louis into an embrace. He wrapped his arms around Harry’s neck and buried his face in his curls.

 

”Been wanting to do that for too long,” Harry mumbled into Louis’ neck.

 

”For how long exactly?” Louis asked, breathing in Harry’s hair.

 

”I dunno… from the first time I saw you?” Harry lifted his lips to brush Louis’ cheek and Louis closed his eyes automatically. _Harry had wanted to kiss him from the first time they saw each other._

 

”Why didn’t you, then?” Louis sighed back.

 

”I was afraid you wouldn’t want to kiss me back,” Harry said quietly. “Plus it would’ve been super weird since we didn’t even know each other.”

 

Louis turned his face to look at Harry with a chuckle, ”Of course I wanted to kiss you, but you make a good point.”

 

Harry laughed shyly and looked at Louis’ lips and then him again, ”That’s really good to hear”, he said and kissed Louis again. And again. And Louis kissed him back, he doubted there would ever be a time he wouldn’t kiss him back.

 

✿✿✿

 

The grass felt good under Louis’ feet as he was jumping on the edge of the football field. He was following the game that was going on and constantly yelled things like ”Good defense!” and ”Watch out!” The day was cloudy but warm. No signs of rain, fortunately.

 

The players were about ten years old and all running and jumping around the field. It was a pleasure to watch and the kids seemed to enjoy themselves. Louis didn’t always like leaving for practice but he always came back happy and full of energy. The kids were all from low-income families, and they were wearing all sorts of gear, but that didn’t stop any of them from enjoying the game and doing what they loved to do. 

 

Even though Louis wasn’t religious or anything, YMCA had done so much for him when he had been younger, and now he loved the fact that he was able to give something back.

 

The lot had been on the field for over an hour and their game time was running out. Louis whistled the game and announced the team wearing orange YMCA jerseys as winners, ”Brilliant lads, good game today. See you next Sunday, eh?” Louis was on a squat and the kids around him nodded and started to split.

 

One boy, Leo, in an oversized jersey looked over Louis’ shoulder and pointed at something at the corner of the field, ”Who’s that?”

 

Louis turned around, still squatting, to look at the same direction. There was a tall man on the other side of the fence. Harry.

 

Louis stood up and started walking towards him, Leo at his heels. Harry’s hair was a bit curlier than usual, he was wearing the same black skinny jeans as always, and a red and black lumberjack plaid coat, which looked the same as the coat the homeless man living on an alley beside them had. He wasn’t called Lumberjack-Jack for no reason. Louis always gave him the change in his pocket when he passed him. He also knew better, that the jacket Harry was wearing was in fact Yves Saint Laurent and cost nearly two-thousand pounds. Only because he had seen an open spread of the fashion magazine one of his sisters had been reading. Only because of that and nothing else. 

 

Louis reached him, ”What are you doing here?”

 

”Is that the salutation I get?” Harry grinned at Louis and something turned in his stomach.

 

”Hello, how have I gotten the unexpected pleasure to see you here on this lovely Sunday afternoon?” Louis smiled back at Harry.

 

Harry laughed and Louis was too endeared, ”That’s more like it. No um- I was just passing by when I saw you practicing.” Louis just nodded and said oh, so Harry continued, ”So… what’s going on here?”

 

”Oh, I’m, uhm, volunteering and kinda coaching these little fellas here,” Louis tried to hide his blush by putting his hand on Leo’s shoulder.

 

Leo looked up at Louis and then back at Harry, ”Who are you?”

 

”Oh, hello, I’m Harry,” Harry said and smiled at Leo, ”I’m, um-” Harry glanced at Louis, who tried to stare at Leo like he was the most interesting child he had ever seen in order to avoid eye contact with Harry, ”I’m a friend of Louis’.”

 

”I’m Leo. You talk like my mum and dad,” Leo pointed out bluntly. Louis’ head cocked up to look at Harry, who met his eyes for a second before looking back at Leo.

 

”So, Leo. How old are you?” Harry tried to grin the awkward away.

 

”I’m seven,” answered Leo, he was scanning Harry from head to toe with his eyes.

 

”Wow, seven! That’s a lot, you’re almost as old as Louis here,” Harry smiled at Leo, and Louis knew he was just making conversation, but suddenly he felt really young, and really stupid. Harry was a grown man, whereas Louis was just a dumb teenager. Felt like one, too.

 

”Yeah, I am. And you’re old,” Leo said, frowning his eyebrows at Harry. Louis was just about to open his mouth, when Harry bursted into his seal-bark sounding laughter. It made Louis smile.

 

”Yeah, you’re right. I’m reeeeaaaally old. I’m gonna have ’em play Jay-Z  at my funeral,” Harry grimaced at Leo, who laughed out loud and mirrored the expression on his face.

 

”I think we have to get going, the other team’s about to take over the field,” Louis said and squeezed Leo’s shoulder.

 

Harry looked back at Louis with fondness, ”Should I wait for you? We could get a coffee or something,” he shrugged and something about that made Louis heart race. He had been kind of avoiding Harry ever since their last time together, everyone always talked about how amazing dating is - they never talk about how much anxiety it involves.

 

Being with Harry was fun and exciting and great, but every time Louis actually thought about meeting him, his automatic reaction was ”no”. It felt like he just wanted to go back to normal, back to his own comfort zone. Back to being by himself and not worrying about life actually going forward all the time.

 

”No, um- no. I have to go home, sorry,” Louis lied, beetled off the offer. He still hadn’t shrugged off the feeling of his young-ness and didn’t feel like hanging out with Harry would make it any better.

 

Harry looked just a little bit disappointed, ”It’s okay, I’ll see you around, then?”

 

”See you around,” Louis nodded, smiling shyly, before turning around to walk away.

 

Leo walked backwards beside him, ”Bye, old-Harry!” He waved.

 

”Bye, old-Leo!” Louis heard Harry yell, but didn’t look back.

 

✿✿✿

 

Louis’ thumb hovered over the ”Send” button as he stared at the message he had typed. He didn’t know if he and Harry were quite there yet, in the texting-about-everything-phase, but he might as well give it a shot. The blue speech bubble popped up on his screen.

 

** im bored :/ **

 

Plain but effective, for he got a reply almost immediately.

 

** come over. x **

 

Louis felt swirling in his stomach - he knew the way over to Harry’s studio, and it wasn’t too far away either, but…

 

** on my way :) **

 

Louis decided to wear the jeans that made his butt look good and his favorite tee. His heart was pounding the whole way there and even when Harry greeted him with a warm hug that smelled like green apple and something else, even then he had to swallow a little bit.

 

The duck and the goat came to greet him at the door; they were curious and looked at Louis with their empty eyes before returning to their daily activities which included but were not limited to eating and sleeping.

 

Louis was the first to say something after Harry had gone to his little kitchen to make them some tea.

 

”Look, about the other day. I know what you must think of me, but YMCA has helped me a lot back when I was younger, and I want to give something back. And I don’t want you to think less of me or any of us just because-”

 

Harry raised his head from the cupboard and started striding across the floor to Louis, ”What? How can you think that little of me? Louis, you cannot possibly understand how I felt when I recognized it was you on the field,” Harry gave Louis a quick hug before taking his face in his hands, ”I’m so proud of you, what you do is very admirable. All that makes you more of a contributor to this city that I’ve ever been. Louis you are _so_ important.”

 

Louis just looked deep into Harry’s green eyes gone big and just blinked over and over and over again. Because Harry was too good for him. He didn’t deserve him. Harry was so unbelievably beautiful and lovely inside out whereas Louis was just a stupid child doing everything wrong.

 

”Kiss me,” he breathed, and not a second later he felt Harry’s pink lips on his own and just inhaled his scent. He wrapped his arms around Harry’s neck, and Harry grabbed his hips to pull him closer. At that moment, Louis didn’t feel young at all. He didn’t feel childish. He didn’t feel like Harry was better or older or wiser than him. He felt that they were together and nothing else really mattered.

 

✿✿✿

 

The sun was shining on the warm pavement. The chilly wind blew dry leaves around the city enjoying the last beautiful autumn days. Fancy people were wearing huge sunglasses with expensive wool coats and silk scarves. Louis was feeling a little misplaced and his toes were cold.

 

His hand brushed Harry’s once in awhile as they were walking down the sidewalk. Harry was wearing the same skinny jeans as always, but now with a long grey wool coat, a black cashmere scarf and his hair on a bun. He looked so good Louis had to sneak glances as they went.

 

Harry obviously belonged here, walking past all the luxurious boutiques which’ names Louis didn’t know how to pronounce. But Louis didn’t belong here, this was actually the very opposite of his natural habitat. He had tried to wear his most neutral clothes – a blue jean jacket with a white shirt underneath, paired with black skinny jeans as well.

 

Louis tried to walk as close to Harry as possible, he might not get home alive if they drifted apart. After in all fifteen minutes of contemplating whether or not take Harry’s hand, he decided that a little bit of over attachment was better than being ran over by a pair of Louboutins.

 

He gently grabbed Harry’s hand and intertwined their fingers. They weren’t walking very fast, but Louis’ heart was fluttering. He still got butterflies with Harry, he thought he’d never get over it. Harry turned to look at him and smiled shyly, eyes twinkling. He then looked at their hands and squeezed lightly. Louis smiled back and leaned in Harry’s arm for a second, sighing quietly.

 

They were just about to enter Burberry, when a man stepped out of the store. He was wearing a brown trench coat, a grey sweater underneath and blue skinny jeans. The man didn’t catch Louis’ attention any further, before hearing Harry’s voice, ”Liam?”

 

The man turned to their direction and recognition slid over his face, ”Harry! Oh my god, how long has it been?” The man, Liam, smiled widely and walked towards them. Harry detached himself from Louis’ hand and took a few steps over to Liam to hug him.

 

”Too long, man. How was your trip to Iceland?” Harry took the man by the shoulders and measured his face and body with his eyes. The wind was chilly and Louis felt it underneath his skin.

 

”It was great, yeah. Lots of new stuff,” Liam nodded and gave Harry a white smile. He was tall, clearly muscular, had great teeth, beard, plump lips… in other words everything Louis didn’t. The sting of jealousy was cold in Louis’ lungs.

 

”That sounds fantastic! Oh, Liam, there’s someone I want you to meet,” Harry took a few steps back and waved Louis over to them. Louis obeyed shyly, his legs felt numb and resistant to move. Harry wrapped his arm around him, and he didn’t feel quite so cold, ”Liam, this is Louis-” Harry turned his eyes on him, ”my boyfriend.”

 

_Boyfriend._ The surprise on Liam’s face was mirrored from Louis’. He realized that before this they hadn’t actually discussed their relationship status, and every doubt he had had about Harry was now slithering away. He was Harry’s boyfriend, and Harry was his boyfriend. They were each other’s boyfriends.

 

Louis looked up at Harry and he was gleaming. He most definitely looked dumb and like his face was about to split in half, but he didn’t care. He didn’t feel cold at all, and Harry’s smile was as wide as Louis’, if not even wider.

 

Then Louis remembered Liam standing in front of them and turned to look at him, ”Hi, I’m Louis, nice to meet you,” he sticked his hand forward and Liam shook it, ”Liam, nice to meet you too.”

 

”Me and Liam go back a long way, he’s a photographer,” Harry explained, still smiling, ”He traveled to Iceland for a few months to pursue his plans on piecing together an exhibition.”

 

Liam nodded, ”And succeeded, partly, at least. Some of the galleries have already expressed their interest towards my pieces.” He looked very proud, and if this was the super talented photographer friend Harry had occasionally talked about, he should be, too.

 

”Wow, what’s it like, being a photographer?” Louis asked, curious. He was afraid he was impolite, but Liam’s expression cleared up instantly as he began explaining.

 

”Well, it depends. Some days are draining and make you question your entire career path, and some days you find yourself just admiring everything you do.” Liam was grimacing and Harry shook his head, ”You smug”, he mumbled and then continued out loud.

 

”Maybe you could shoot Louis someday, eh?” Harry was rubbing Louis’ side with his thumb and his tone of voice was genuinely excited.

 

”Oh no, no no. You must have a lot on your plate, and I’m not very good in front of a camera,” Louis shook his head apologetically and kicked Harry lightly. Even though he had to admit the idea was thrilling, he could never ask Liam to do that, even if he had any money to pay for anything in the first place.

 

”You can’t know that until you’ve tried, love,” Harry nudged Louis and smiled encouragingly.

 

”Well, I’ll have to check. Even though you seem to have some brilliant cheek bones for the job. I have had a few off-job ideas we could work on,” Liam rubbed his chin looking thoughtful.

 

”Brilliant, just give me a call if something comes up,” Harry said and smiled. He seemed even more excited than Louis, who was mainly just embarrassed.

 

”Yeah, will do. But now, if you’ll excuse me, I have to head home or Cheryl will kick my bum,” he made a funny face and Harry laughed lightly.

 

”See you around, Payno,” Harry waved at Liam, who was already walking away from them.

 

”See you around, Hazza,” Liam waved his hand over his head without looking back.

 

”Who’s Cheryl?” Louis frowned questioningly, staring at Liam’s back.

 

”His girlfriend of a million years, they have a baby boy together,” Harry shrugged and turned to look at Louis. The last hunch of tension Louis had ever had was now smoothy wiped away. He nodded and bit his lip.

 

”He seems nice,” Louis said, half aloud, turning his face to Harry. His toes were still a bit cold.

 

”Yeah, he used to be the best person I knew,” Harry smiled wistfully, looking at Liam, who had almost drowned into the crowd.

 

”Used to? What happened?” Louis frowned and put his evidently small hand on Harry’s chest.

 

”Someone else came into the picture,” Harry said and turned to look at Louis. It took a few seconds for his brain to click, as always, but then he realized what Harry meant. Louis’ heart fluttered and he smiled so big his cheeks hurt. He shook his head and pulled Harry into a gentle kiss, which was just smiles and teeth and bright autumn sun.

 

 

Later Louis was feeling some scarves at Louis Vuitton, but didn’t have the decency to ask for the price. He knew he couldn’t afford one so he just tried to look distant, avoiding eye contact with any clerks possibly around. The scarf was so soft – it was light blue, perfectly matching with his eyes if he said so himself, and there were no huge LV markings anywhere. He wanted to indulge himself; he had never had anything expensive.

 

”Finding anything?” Louis jumped hearing Harry’s voice from right behind him. He spun around, trying to cover his interest in the scarf and shook his head in what he hoped to be a relaxed motion.

 

”No, nothing in particular,” he tried to keep his voice steady and casually gazed around the store, before looking back at Harry, ”Ready to go?” Louis fumbled the hem of his coat and blinked. He was still Harry’s boyfriend. He had been Harry’s boyfriend at Burberry’s and YSL and when they had been walking in the street and he was Harry’s boyfriend now, standing here, in a Louis Vuitton store next to the table where the scarves had been put on display.

 

”Yeah, you go ahead I’ll just pay these,” Harry lifted the pile of fabric folded over his arm. Louis nodded and made his way out, trying not to mind the security guards standing on both sides of the door.

 

The chilly wind started to make a mess out of Louis’ hair as soon as he stepped out on the street. Soon he noticed it was useless trying to sweep it off his face, so he just submitted to his fate and started looking at the display window of the store. His favorite scarf was wrapped around the neck of one of the mannequins. Louis sighed.

 

Harry stepped outside as well, ”Do you want to go somewhere or are we done for the day?” Harry asked, eyes sweeping the street. Louis shrugged and said that everything was fine by him.

 

✿✿✿

 

Louis was startled when Harry threw his paintbrush across the hall leaving a pink mark on the wall, and slamming the palette on the table. Louis lifted his head to look at Harry, who had grabbed his hair with both hands and was squatting on the floor. He gently fell backwards and just laid on the ground, limbs pointing in every direction, staring at the ceiling.

 

Louis had been laying on the sofa lazily petting Cat, who now made its way to Harry, and started nibbling his ear. Cat was like a dog, kinda. Harry gently stroked its head. Louis smiled to himself and suddenly just felt a huge wave of affection drowning him. He wanted to stay here forever, Harry caressing his pet goat and Louis hanging around at his huge studio. Louis put aside Harry’s sketchbook, which he had been browsing. He looked at Harry for a while, before asking what was wrong.

 

”I don’t know what to do,” his answer echoed in the hall. Cat bleated and walked away, ”Some friend you are,” Harry pointed out at her.

 

”She’s just making sure you’re okay before giving you your privacy again,” Louis switched his position on the couch and was now facing Harry, still laying on the ground.

 

”I don’t need _privacy_ I need _inspiration!”_ Harry raised his voice, frustrated. Louis felt a little helpless for a few seconds, before deciding, that it was time for something. Something he had been thinking about but had always pushed the thought aside.

 

Louis stood up and grabbed Goose in his arms, before walking over to Harry. He slowly sat next to his head, gently stroking the duck, who stayed quiet, eyes closed. Harry turned his head to his side to look at Louis, expectant.

 

Louis inhaled and started, _”Well sometimes I go out by myself, and I look across the water…”_

 

He saw Harry’s eyes go wide, Louis knew this was his soft spot and that’s why he had learned the lyrics. He had been saving it for a moment, and that moment was this. He was nervous, because he hadn’t had time to actually practice.

 

_”And I think of all the things, what you're doing, and in my head I paint a picture.”_ Harry’s reaction made it a little easier to breathe for Louis, because in his eyes there was no judgment or analysis. There was just pure surprise… and maybe something else Louis couldn’t apologize for.

 

_”Since I've come on home, well my body's been a mess-”_ he smiled at Harry, who had taken his hand into his own, huge palm, _”And I've missed your ginger hair, and the way you like to dress-”_ Louis stroked Harry’s hair, and then his expensive loose shirt in the right parts of the lyrics. He felt his voice flowing, it echoed in the big hall and made it stronger and better, _”Won't you come on over, stop making a fool out of me. Why don't you come on over, Valerie?”_ He felt like he was in a music video. What a cliché.

 

Harry’s eyes looked a little blue, and his lips a little redder than usual, _”Valerie… Why don’t you come on over, Valerie?”_ Louis slowed down a little and bit his lip at the end, blushing and looking at Goose still sitting in his lap. He quacked approvingly.

 

Harry squeezed Louis hand and Louis squeezed it back. Then Harry pulled him on the floor with him, Goose sprinting off his lap. Harry maneuvered Louis on the floor on his back, and turned on his side to look at him. Harry supported his head with his elbow on the ground and his hand covering half of his face. Harry was just grinning at Louis.

 

”What?” Louis asked and looked back at Harry, smiling wide. Harry’s teeth were really straight.

 

”Nothing, I’m laying on the floor of my studio and my boyfriend just sang me my favorite song in the whole universe, and it sounded _perfect,”_ Harry bit his lip. “I didn’t even know you could sing.”

 

Harry calling him his _boyfriend_ still turned Louis’ stomach around and made him tingle all over. Harry leaning in and kissing him very, _very_ deep didn’t help his tingling sensation at all, but it did make his pants tighten just a little bit from the front, ”Thank you,” Louis mouthed between the kisses.

 

Harry pulled back just a few inches, staring at Louis’ lips, ”Even if I won’t accomplish anything else in my life, I swear I will have that recorded and played at my funeral,” he whispered and made Louis’ heart race.

 

”I thought you were gonna play Jay-Z,” Louis smirked and bit his lip.

 

”Shut up,” Harry shook his head and pulled Louis into another kiss, ”Oops, and one other thing.”

 

Louis frowned and pulled back to get a good look of Harry’s face. (Still amazing, by the way.) ”What other thing?”

 

”The blue scarf you tried to hide from me the other day at Louis Vuitton’s… it’s in the cupboard,” Harry smirked and bit his lip.

 

Louis’ jaw popped open, ”You fffuckin’ didn’t.”

 

Harry just laughed.

 

✿✿✿

 

_”He can only hold her for so long, the lights are on but no one's home…”_ It was obvious that Harry had picked the music. Liam had already prepared the set in his studio: he had cleared a corner where almost the whole wall was glass with a wide window ledge to sit on. The floor was light wood and the walls white.

 

”I thought this would look good on you,” Harry said almost shyly and reached for his bag pulling out a shirt wrapped in decorative paper. Louis took it and unveiled a white YSL tee with black print on the front. It was so Louis’ style he almost forgot it must’ve cost a small fortune.

 

”Are you… are you giving this to me?” Louis asked incredulously, looking at Harry, who nodded.

 

”I bought it for this,” he smiled and bit his beautiful pink lip, ”Try it on,” he hurried impatiently.

 

Of course the shirt was perfect and Louis felt like a spoiled baby but he also liked Harry very much so he couldn’t say no. Liam was a splendid photographer and made Louis feel very relaxed and sure of himself, even though he had very little experience from being in front of a camera.

 

After the shoot Liam praised the pictures and said he’d send them to Harry as soon as possible, ”I could use you in my other, actual works too. If you want to, that is,” and somehow Louis heard himself say yes yet again and then they were off.

 

Harry took him to a fancy restaurant and it all felt like a dream from which Louis never wanted to wake up. After that Harry took him to his actual apartment at Victoria and they watched a silly romantic movie which Louis pretended to hate but actually liked.

 

”Um, Louis,” Harry asked carefully. Uh-oh. ”Could you- I mean, would want to spend the night? Here? With me?” He bit his lip and looked like he had just said something really sensitive. Louis’ heart skipped a little tiny beat. He had actually never thought about it. Spending the night. It was exciting and fucking horrifying at the same time. He knew Harry wouldn’t force him to do anything, but felt so inexperienced compared to him.

 

”Yeah sure, I’d like that. I’ll just let my mum know,” Louis said trying to sound confident, where in reality he had never stayed over in someone’s place his mum didn’t know personally. He prayed she would let him stay over for one night - nothing would be as embarrassing as having Harry drive him home now.

 

His mum picked up, ”Hey love, it’s late, where are you?” Louis quickly lowered the volume - he didn’t want Harry hearing the cross-examination that was about to unleash.

 

”Hi mum, yeah um, can I stay over at Harry’s?” He blushed and tried to keep his voice low, it was humiliating enough having to tell your mum where you were, but to ask for a permission to stay over? It sounded like a sleepover and that sounded like something children did. And Louis was not a child, right?

 

”What? No, absolutely not. I’m not having you staying a night at a stranger’s house,” his mother’s tone was final. Desperation started to bubble in Louis’ chest. Harry had gone back to the kitchen, he was being polite and acted like he didn’t hear Louis’ distress.

 

”Mum, _please._ I’ll do anything,” Louis knew that was a mistake, but with his mum, this was the last card he had to play. Harry came back from the kitchen holding two beautiful white Villeroy  & Boch mugs. Louis knew because he had read it from the bottom of the cup earlier.

 

_”Anything_ you say?” Louis’ mum’s voice dragged him back to the phone call, ”Let’s see… okay, I guess so, but on one condition: I want to speak with Harry,” Louis blushed so hard he felt like a Christmas decoration, his eyes shot up to Harry, who raised his eyebrows at him.

 

”Mum, _no,”_ Louis tried to sound as convincing as he could, but right now, it was not working out for him. Harry put the other cup of tea down and gently sipped from his own, observing the 50% of the phone call he was currently witnessing.

 

”Well, then he can probably give you a ride home,” her voice sounded victorious, she knew she’d have her way, because frankly, Louis didn’t have a choice. He glanced at Harry, who was still looking at him and sighed. He handed the phone towards Harry, ”She wants to speak with you”.

 

_Me?_ Harry mouthed and put his cup down, taking the phone and bringing it to his ear, ”Good evening Mrs. Tomlinson, this is Harry Styles speaking.” Louis blushed and suddenly realized that Harry was good with mothers. Of course he was good with mothers. He was good with everyone.

 

”Yes,” Harry said, looking intensively at the cup of tea on the coffee table beside him, ”Yes, I am.” Louis didn’t know what his mother was saying, but he was afraid of it nevertheless, ”Well… no, I don’t think that defines anything.” Louis knew his mum was telling Harry he was too old for Louis, he _knew_ that, he _felt_ that. His mum could be really protective, and Louis was afraid she’d scare Harry off.

 

There were a few more yeses and of courses, but then Harry’s face somehow intensified; his eyebrows furrowed, his mouth tensed and he got really pale somehow, ”I would never do that, ma’am,” Harry’s voice was the most serious Louis had ever heard and all his senses sharpened to record everything that would happen next.

 

Harry turned to look at Louis and his eyes were dark and serious. Louis couldn’t do anything but look back at him, ”Yes, ma’am. I really do.” Louis blushed from head to toe - he didn’t know what they were talking about, but he could guess.

 

”Thank you, ma’am.” The tightness in Louis’ chest started to ease when he heard Harry say that. He actually could stay over at Harry’s - and if he could do it once, he could do it again. Then a raging red covered Harry’s neck and face as he quickly removed his eyes from Louis, ”Yes, we will.” At that moment, Louis made the decision to move out as soon as he could.

 

A couple more thank yous and Harry ended the phone call. He handed the phone back to Louis grinning, ”You can stay.” A relieved smile spread on Louis’ face. He could stay, but at what cost?

 

”I’m sorry for that, I feel like such a child. I imagine it’d be much easier if you’d just go out with someone your own age-” Louis felt young and ashamed, he didn’t want to look at Harry when he threw his phone on the couch.

 

Even before he could end his sentence, he felt Harry’s hands on his cheeks and was forced to look him in the eye. Every time he was surprised by how aggressively green they were. ”Listen, I meant what I just told your mum: I don’t think your age or my age defines anything. I think the most important thing is that I am here and you are here with me, and that we’re here together, right now.

”And I think I’d probably date you even if you were like forty or something if I could just find you again. And if I couldn’t, well, then that would be a real fucking shame because you’re really fucking amazing.”

 

Louis was sure that he would actually start crying because he definitely didn’t deserve the miracle that was Harry Styles, so he tiptoed to kiss Harry on the mouth in case this miracle would appear to be just a dream. But it wasn’t and Harry kissed back joyously.

 

Louis could feel Harry’s stubble scratching his cheek as he wrapped his arms around Harry’s neck. The soft kisses deepened and then started to quicken as Louis was still trying to tiptoe and Harry grabbed him everywhere - his hands travelled in Louis’ lower back, his hair, his waist and his bum.

 

Louis felt a twitch in his pants and moaned before he could stop himself. Before he even had the time to be ashamed, he noticed Harry was actually in the same state as him. Louis could feel something hard pressing against his thigh and instinctively reached his hand to stroke the front of Harry’s jeans. Harry moaned eyes shut and that was literally the hottest thing Louis had ever seen, the deep voice sent a hot wave to his pants and for a moment he was sure he couldn’t breathe.

 

Before Louis could do anything else, Harry pulled him to his arms and started carrying him towards his bedroom. Harry laid Louis onto his bed so delicately that Louis almost told him he loved him. He felt Harry’s tall shadow crawling on top of him and starting to kiss his neck. Louis was actually a bit terrified because he was, embarrassingly enough, a fucking virgin, and wasn’t too sure how this would play out.

 

His thoughts got sidetracked when Harry slid his large hand under Louis’ shirt and gently pulled it off. Then his hand was stroking Louis’ bulge through his jeans and Louis whined out loud. It quietened when Harry kissed him on he mouth - and wow okay, Louis had definitely never been kissed like that before. It was tantalizing, enticing, luring, so electrifying that Louis felt like he was on fire. Or maybe he had been on fire the entire time.

 

For a moment they stayed like that. Harry stroking Louis, both panting, bodies curled up on the dark bed. The kisses were deep and messy and nothing like Louis had ever experienced. Harry sucked Louis’ tongue and their teeth clanked. Harry’s long hair brushed against Louis’ cheeks, curtaining the sides and creating an intimate space - not that they actually needed any in an otherwise empty flat.

 

Then Harry started fumbling with Louis’ jeans. He opened the zipper and started pulling them down. Louis hadn’t even realized how hard he was, and now it was starting to ache. Harry mouthed Louis’ bulge through his briefs and Louis let out an impatient lamentation. His whole body was worked up and tingling with agitation. He was so hot he didn’t even realize Harry was still in full clothing. That had to change.

 

Finally Harry pulled off Louis’ briefs as well and Louis actually didn’t know what he was expecting, but was still surprised when he felt Harry’s mouth kissing the underside of his cock. He let out a cry and that was Harry’s sign to get to it. But he let Louis wait, naked, spread out on his bed, already on the verge of an orgasm.

 

”You’re so pretty like this,” Harry said, trailing Louis’ waist with his finger, ”So, so pretty.”

 

Louis looked at Harry, pleading. Harry smirked, biting his lip and then, right then, when a distant light hit his face in the dark room, he was this sexual _man_ who was going to destroy Louis in every way. And Louis wanted that, he had probably wanted that since the very beginning.

 

Harry smeared the precome with his thumb. He made eye contact with Louis, as he lifted his index finger on his lips and licked the cum out of it. Louis exhaled at the sight but couldn’t stop looking, his stomach was twitching and he could only hear his own unsteady breaths. Finally Harry lowered himself and took the tip into his mouth, Louis bemoaned. Harry’s pink mouth around his cock, eyelashes fluttering shut, curly hair framing his face. This moment was all it took for Louis to spread his fingers in Harry’s hair.

 

Then Harry took it all in, just like that. He didn’t gag, he didn’t gasp for air. Louis bit his lip so hard that he could taste the blood when Harry started to move – his mouth going all the way down and then up, plopping on the head. Louis’ cock was dripping with saliva and his mouth moaning Harry’s name, fumbling the syllables. Louis grabbed the sheets and almost hit his head on the headboard.

 

Harry had picked up a steady rhythm, he was a fucking pro at this. Louis was seeing stars already. ”Ha-harry,” he keened, ”Yeah - yeah - aah,” he was panting, his whole body shaking. No one had ever given him a blowjob before, but he wasn’t sure it could get much better than this. Like a reflex, it was an accident really, Louis started jerking his hips up, fucking into Harry’s mouth. But Harry didn’t gag, he actually moaned around Louis’ hard cock, the sound vibrating and making Louis inner thighs treble. This was so much better than anything ever.

 

Two more plops around Louis’ cock and he was coming into Harry’s mouth, and Harry swallowed humbly. Louis’ back arched up and he made a series of whimpers, he felt like a firework exploding into thousands of colorful bits of fire before going lax on the bed. The next thing he knew was Harry kissing his cheek. Louis blinked his eyes open and looked at Harry, ”Oh my god.”

 

”That bad, huh,” Harry smirked and swiped Louis’ face with his eyes. Louis exhaled and pulled Harry’s mouth against his. He could taste his own come, which was a little gross, but bearable because it was Harry and he’d kiss him whatever he tasted like.

 

Louis felt Harry’s bulge against his thigh and remembered that Harry hadn’t been taken care of yet. But Louis had never sucked anyone off before, with time he would probably learn, but tonight was not the night.

 

He started easing Harry’s shirt up, feeling his muscles all tense next to his tiny palm. Before he could even get the shirt off, Harry grabbed Louis’ wrist, looking him in the eye, ”You don’t have to do this,” he said, seriousness in his tone, ”I want to,” Louis answered, meeting his eyes and carefully pulled Harry’s shirt off – his dark curls dropping on his porcelain skin.

 

Louis inhaled through his mouth when he saw Harry’s tattoos. They were beautiful and detailed. He had to stroke the edges of the swallows and the butterfly tattoo and just admire them. Louis trailed Harry’s collarbones with his finger, then gently starting to kiss up his neck. Harry bent his neck and sighed, eyes closed.

 

Carefully, Louis started unzipping Harry’s pants, both following the movement. Slowly Louis pulled the black jeans off to reveal the already damp front of Harry’s briefs. Louis sighed and stroked Harry’s thigh. Harry seemed a little ashamed, so Louis kissed him on the lips, gently laying them both on the sheets. When he backed away he saw Harry looking at him in the eye, so he returned the gaze, stroking Harry’s cheek. His eyes were filled with soft fond and affection, and Louis felt an entirely different whirl in his stomach. He couldn’t help but smile and kiss Harry again. ”You’re so beautiful, you have no idea, my baby,” Harry whispered and Louis felt butterflies. He bit his lip and nodded really fast against Harry’s neck.

 

That exact moment was something you see in a French movie or in an art student’s portfolio. The dim light faintly illuminating Louis’ smooth back and bum, Harry’s thighs and his hand stroking Louis’ curves. The silence wrapping them together tightly as they tangled in the sheets. This gave Louis an idea of maybe inviting Liam to photograph them sometime, would that be crazy? Absolutely.

 

Louis’ hand slid to stroke Harry’s bulge through the fabric, Harry gasping underneath him, eyes closing tight. Louis couldn’t help grinning, as he nibbled Harry’s earlobe. He hid his face in Harry’s neck, as he slipped his hand into Harry’s briefs and sucked a hickey onto his neck. Slowly he slid the last piece of clothing off of Harry, and realized that he was now naked in bed with a man and they were doing exactly what it sounds like. The thought didn’t freak him out as much as he thought it would, because it was _Harry._ Sweet, fonding, caring, amy-winehouse-loving Harry.

 

Carefully Louis wrapped his hand around Harry’s cock and started stroking it up and down. Harry’s eyes closed and his mouth opened into a silent whine. Louis kissed his chest and continued the movement; a little faster, a little harder, catching a rhythm. Harry was now moaning and arching on the bed, his arms and legs pressing to the sheets. They were both rocking on the bed, Louis panting and Harry moaning out loud.

 

It didn’t last very long – after a while Harry made a rough noise from the back of his throat and came into his hand for a long time. Then his body relaxed on the bed and Louis cleaned him up with the tissues he found in the drawer beside the bed. Harry fully came around when Louis was tucking him under the blanket.

 

”Hey,” he said, looking at Louis.

 

”Hey yourself,” Louis said and stroked Harry’s hair.

 

”I’m really happy that your mom let you stay tonight,” Harry smiled gently with drowsy eyes.

 

”Please don’t say that, you’re making me feel like a baby,” Louis shook his head and shuffled in the sheets.

 

”I’m sorry, but I am glad. And besides–” Harry wrapped his arms around Louis and pulled him so close that Louis had difficulties looking him in the eye, ”You are _my_ baby.”

 

Louis blushed, ”How about you’d call me your boyfriend, you wanker.”

 

”I would, but I still can’t quite believe that the prettiest, funniest, smartest, most beautiful person I know is dating me and that I can call him my boyfriend,” Harry’s eyes were almost closed, but Louis could still see them shining in the dim light filtering through the blinds.

 

That was by far the best thing anyone had ever said to Louis, and all he could manage in that situation was, ”Well, you better get used to it,” before kissing Harry and falling asleep in his arms.

 

✿✿✿

 

”So how’s your sugar daddy doing? Still old?” Calvin asked, holding a cigarette between his two fingers, leaning out the window of his flat.

 

”Bite me,” Louis huffed and threw a pillow at him. Calvin and Zayn had mocked Harry ever since they found out about the whole thing - and normally Louis wouldn’t mind, but it was Harry for God’s sake. And they didn’t know Harry like Louis did. As a matter of fact they didn’t know him at all.

 

”Watch it kiddo, that’s something _Harold_ wants to do,” Calvin continued, pronouncing the name like an old person. He was such an arse. ”By the way, how’s your sex life going? Probably takes him a week to get it up-” Calvin put out the cigarette and turned to Louis.

 

”I think that’s enough Cal,” Zayn was lying on the leather couch in the middle of the room, his voice was low but made the point.

 

”Yeah, yeah anyway, has he bought anything nice to you recently? A scarf? Shoes? Thong?” Cal’s teasing smile was repulsive like he had just hit the motherlode.

 

”Shut up, Cal. You’re being a prick,” Louis didn’t have the energy to deal with this right now. He had had a long day and the last thing he wanted to hear right now was Calvin blaspheming his and Harry’s relationship (which he knew nothing about).

 

Louis was just taking a step towards the door, when Calvin decided this was too good a topic to waste. ”Lil Miss Princess defending his _daddy._ Have you forgotten the point of sugar daddy already, Princess? You’re supposed to take their money in exchange for sex, not fall in love with them,” his tone was assailing and he was staring at Louis challengingly.

 

For two seconds Louis was speechless, he knew Calvin was an arse. What he didn’t know was that he was actually capable of insulting him in order to jazz up his relationships. For a moment he saw his own expression mirroring on Cal’s face, ”Oh bloody hell… Zayn! You can’t believe this - Louis is actually in love with Sugar-Harry! Ohh this is priceless! You should see the look on your face Lou!” Calvin was clapping his hands together and almost _prancing._

 

”Cut it out Cal, that’s not true and you know it. You’re just being a prick ’cause you don’t have anyone,” Louis heard just how pathetic he sounded and blamed himself for not coming up with a better comeback.

 

”Aw come on Lou, we’re all friends here!” Cal slobbered squeakily but Louis shook his head, ”Sure doesn’t feel like it Cal,” he said before walking out the door. He didn’t want to hear Cal’s _What did I do? You’re just being childish!_ ’Cause Louis wasn’t being childish, he was offended and angry. He didn’t want to go home to have the same conversation with his sisters, so...

 

At first Louis thought Harry was awake, because he was tossing and turning in his bed as Louis greeted Cat and Goose. Then, when he approached the bed quietly, he noticed Harry being asleep, but restless: he was lying on an uncomfortable-looking position, the blanket almost falling off the bed, curls messy and lips parted.

 

The moonlight filtered through the windows creating new shapes and shadows around the studio. Everything else was faded out as a background and Harry was the masterpiece - his slim, pale, tattooed body sprawled across the bed, his chocolatey curls messy and a peaceful expression on his face.

 

Louis hoped he wouldn’t get caught staring, he just couldn’t turn away. Harry was too beautiful, too enchanting. Louis’ eyes roamed Harry’s body, his porcelain outlines blending with the white sheets. Louis was _so_ in love.

 

The masterpiece changed – Harry’s brows frowned and his mouth closed, his body turning to another weird position on the bed, he was breathing heavily and he looked unsettled. His huge palm was grasping the sheets.

 

Louis kicked his shoes off and peeled his socks off too. He pulled his shirt over his head and kicked down his trackies. Louis picked up the part of the blanket that was on the floor and rearranged it on the bed. Then the bed dipped a bit as he slipped into it and pulled the blanket over himself as well. He didn’t want to wake Harry up, but apparently his sleep was thin and his dreams wild.

 

Louis carefully stroked Harry’s sleepwarm bicep and he winced awake, inhaling sharply. His eyes were bouncing everywhere and he seemed disorientated. ”Shh, it’s okay, it’s just me,” Louis whispered and Harry’s whole upper body turned to him for a second, before recognizing him. When he did, his eyes closed and there was a deep sigh before his body dropped down to the sheets again.

 

”A bad dream?” Louis asked, now stroking Harry’s hair. He brought his huge palms to cover his face and mumbled, ”Something like that.” His voice was low and raspy and Louis wanted to tell Harry he loved him but thought that it would be a bit weird and inconvenient, so he didn’t say anything, just looked at Harry like that and hoped he knew.

 

”I’m glad you’re here,” Harry whispered and looked back at Louis. Louis just smiled back, before pulling Harry into his arms. Harry tucked his head under Louis’ chin and closed the gap between their bodies, and Louis wrapped his arm around Harry’s waist and got his cold feet angled with Harry’s warm thighs.

 

Louis pressed a gentle kiss on Harry’s curls, but he had already fallen asleep. He slept peacefully without nightmares, and Louis had to give himself a little credit for that. Harry was warm in his arms and Louis was glad he remembered that Harry was the little spoon.

 

✿✿✿

 

A couple of weeks later Louis was doing the dishes at home after dinner. His sisters had gone upstairs to do their homework and play, while his mum was helping him out in the kitchen.

 

”Oh Lou, honey, I forgot to tell you- we’re going to the movies this Friday, so don’t make any plans okay?” His mum said, wiping the plates dry as she spoke.

 

”Um, actually I was gonna hang out with-”

 

”Harry?” She said for him and looked at Louis. She sounded a tiny bit displeased and pursed her lips together, continuing to put the plates back to their original place.

 

”…Yeah,” was the only thing Louis said, for he knew that continuing the conversation would only lead to trouble.

 

Which it did, due to reasons completely unrelated to Louis’ behavior, ”You’re spending an awful lot of time with that man,” said Jay, now seemingly unhappy about that.

 

”Well, he _is_ my boyfriend after all-” Louis said quietly, he knew better than to defy his mother when she had a bone to pick with him. Jay pitched the plate down a little more forcefully than expected and turned to Louis.

 

”That _man_ is _not_ your boyfriend,” she burst out, and before Louis even had a chance to defend himself or Harry to her for his shock, she continued, ”I am glad that you have found someone, I really am, but must that someone be a man _seven years older_ than you? Louis, he’s only using you, can’t you see that?”

 

Louis’ jaw dropped listening to the words his mother spoke to him. He thought Jay understood what he was going through with Harry, but all this time she actually thought that Harry was only taking advantage of Louis? He couldn’t speak so he only shook his head, eyes burning from the tears he was trying to hold back.

 

”Louis, you’ve had your fun, but now it’s time to get your feet back on the ground,” she crossed her arms on her chest and looked at Louis like he was eight years old again and caught with his hand in the cookie jar.

 

Louis opened his mouth, relying on the words to come out, ”Mum, you don’t understand. This isn’t just some fling, I- he’s my boyfriend!” But the only thing he heard was how pathetic and naive he sounded. Apparently Jay heard that too, because on her face Louis saw only disappointment.

 

”Lou, I can’t protect you forever, you gotta snap out of it,” she calmly started putting the last plates to their places like nothing had happened. But something had happened and now Louis was on the verge of tears. He couldn’t stay here, Jay wouldn’t drop this topic and he wouldn’t stand to see the looks on his sisters’ faces seeing him like this.

 

Louis fled the kitchen and ran up to his room to change. He knew where he was going, it wasn’t far from here. He grabbed his keys and his stash of vodka Calvin gave him for his birthday last year. Jay was still in the kitchen, and Louis moved as quiet has he could, feet nimble. He snuck out the door and into the cold night air.

 

A bit later Louis fumbled for Harry’s buzzer and pressed it. He let it ring again and again and again, but no one answered. His head was buzzing and he felt frustrated. Of course he hadn’t taken his phone with him and of course he was freezing when he hadn’t brought a fucking jacket and of course he was out of liquor.

 

_Well, Harry must come home some time,_ Louis figured and sat down on the cold pavement, orange street lights blurring his vision. He tried not to turn his head too much, to stop the world from spinning. He also tried not thinking about the possible fact that Harry may be staying at Victoria for the night.

 

This neighborhood was really quiet, there wasn’t even any drunk teenagers apart from Louis. He sighed and his breath fumed. It was one of the first cold nights of the autumn. Louis couldn’t feel his toes.

 

He was just drunkenly dozing off against the ice cold concrete, when he heard footsteps coming down the road. He cocked his head up, too quickly, and had to fight to focus his eyes on Harry quickly walking towards him.

 

”Louis!” He exclaimed and kneeled to the same level with Louis’ eyes.

 

”Hi, H-Harry. I’m d-drunk,” Louis’ teeth clanked from the cold, his voice constantly losing focus, he was so so sleepy…

 

”We need to get you inside, you’re shaking,” Harry said with extreme seriousness. Louis hadn’t even noticed. Harry stood up, stuffed his shopping bag, which Louis had also missed, into his large pocket and unlocked the front door. Then he slipped his arms around Louis and enclosed him into a big hug.

 

Louis pressed his face in Harry’s neck, and heard him draw a sharp breath. Louis hadn’t even realized how cold he was - he couldn’t even move his fingers anymore.

 

He heard the door slamming shut behind them, when Harry carried him all the way to the third floor, ”You’re really strong,” Louis mumbled into Harry’s hair. Harry let out a shaky laugh. Louis was so fucking gone for him it was ridiculous. He blushed.

 

Harry let him down when he opened his own front door, still squeezing Louis against his side. When they got in, Cat and Goose strolled to greet them. Harry took off his giant green wool lining parka and wrapped Louis inside it before carrying him onto the sofa.

 

Harry sat down on the giant sofa, and pulled Louis on his lap. Like a fucking baby, but Louis couldn’t complain, because it was Harry and it was warm and he was exactly where he wanted to be. Goose sat back into his basket, whereas Cat followed them to the couch, sniffed at them a little, bleated, and walked away.

 

It was quiet for a bit, Harry stroking Louis’ hair and rubbing his calf, ”You should’ve called first, so I would’ve known not to go out. Bad things happen if you fall asleep in the cold,” Harry’s voice was low and dark.

 

”I’m sorry I… I didn’t plan on coming here and I don’t have my phone with me,” Louis’ talk was slow and slurring. He looked up at Harry, who looked like he was about to start crying at any minute. Louis’ heart turned and he nuzzled himself harder against Harry, who closed his arms around Louis, just squeezing him tight.

 

”Sorry, I just had a scare. Lucky I got you inside on time,” Harry mumbled into Louis’ hair in return. ”What brought you here in the first place?” he backed out a little bit.

 

”You, I guess… I had a bad row with my mum, so I just- left, took a bottle with me and,.. came here,” Louis sighed. He didn’t want to talk about this. He didn’t want to think about what his mum had said about Harry, he couldn’t stop thinking about it, either.

 

”We need to get you home, if they don’t know where you are they’ll-”

 

”Trust me, they know where I am,” Louis retorted. Harry didn’t say anything, he didn’t have to. His green eyes travelled around Louis’ face, ”The fight was… um, about you- kinda,” Louis hid his face.

 

”About _me?”_ Harry looked hurt.

 

Louis looked up into Harry’s green eyes and opened his mouth, ”Am I just a sugarbaby for you?” His heart was pounding.

 

”A what?” Harry raised his eyebrows, looking back at Louis.

 

”Am I your boy toy? Am I around just for your entertainment, because you want admiration from young lads? Are you my sugardaddy?” Those words had burned into his consciousness, he just quoted. Louis should’ve never asked, he instantly knew his question was wrong. He knew, because at that moment, he swore he saw Harry’s heart break just a little.

 

Harry’s eyes darkened and he shook his head, ”How can you ask that? How could you ever even think that? How can you not know how I feel about you, Louis, I lo- I adore you. I think the world of you, you _have to know that,”_ Harry looked so serious, his eyebrows frowned upon his dark green eyes.

 

Louis quickly blinked away every possible tear, he didn’t know what to say. He just nodded and smiled weakly. Harry adored him, Harry had almost said he _loved_ him. Louis couldn’t argue with how he felt, either. He lifted his now warm hand on Harry’s cheek and stroked it gently. He nodded again, ”I think the world of you too.”

 

A wide, relieved smile covered Harry’s face before he leaned in to kiss Louis. It was slow, and gentle and warm. Tongues sliding lazily, eyes closed, smiling. Louis couldn’t blame Harry if he was in love with him, he wasn’t doing much better himself.

 

✿✿✿

 

”Ohhh, what’s this?” Louis almost hit his head on the cupboard when he turned to Harry with a champagne bottle in his hand. Louis knew absolutely nothing about wines or champagnes but the etiquette looked expensive, so.

 

They were at Victoria. After meeting up with Liam over lunch to discuss his latest photographical idea they had decided to stop by at Harry’s actual flat to hang out a bit. Harry sat on the other side of the counter as Louis opened up the doors of his cupboard in the kitchen.

 

Now he was holding the champagne bottle in his hand and set in on the counter. ”Oh, I didn’t even remember I had that, Liam must’ve gave it to me for my birthday I think,” Harry took a closer look and nodded for reassurance, ”Wanna try it?”

 

”Really? Can I?” Louis asked, already reaching for two glasses under the counter, ”I’ve never had champagne before,” he gushed, looking for the bottle opener.

 

The bottle only popped a little, for Louis’ disappointment, and there was no significant foam either. He poured himself just a little bit and tasted it. The champagne sparkled on his tongue and it tasted like money and gold. He was never a fan of the taste of alcoholic beverages but this stuff tasted like something they would drink at Olympos.

 

He poured himself a little more and was about to fill Harry’s glass too.

 

”No thanks,” Harry smiled politely.

 

”But this is really good, you have to try it,” Louis insisted, pouring a glass and sliding it across the table.

 

”I’m sure and I’m sorry, but I don’t drink alcohol,” Harry smiled a little and slid the glass back to Louis.

 

”At all?” Louis raised his eyebrows, still hesitant.

 

”At all,” Harry confirmed, looking Louis straight in the eyes.

 

”Okay, funny it has never come up,” Louis shrugged, pouring the contents of Harry’s glass into his own, ”Why’s that?”

 

Harry’s expression went blank and his eyes started to travel around the table. Oh.

 

”I’m sorry, you don’t have to answer that,” Louis shook his head, he was always such a blabbermouth.

 

”No, no it’s okay um- it’s just uhh, I’ve had bad experiences so I just…” Harry’s voice faded. Those must have been _really_ bad experiences to scare him away for life.

 

Louis put away the glasses, looking at Harry as compassionately as he could, ”Wanna share?”

 

Harry raised his gaze back to Louis’ eyes, and it warmed his heart. Harry frowned and looked down, his large hand spread out on the table, ”I had this… girlfriend,” Harry’s eyes grew dark. ”We hadn’t been together very long, and this one time we went out clubbing together, and after we went to her apartment and she-” Harry swallowed and Louis was dead silent, ”She um, she tried to get me to have sex with her… but I refused, felt it was too soon. But she didn’t like that and she tried to force me into doing it, but I said no and- and then she-” Harry swallowed and frowned like he had a stone in his throat. Louis wanted to touch him so bad he felt like his whole arm was on fire.

 

”She hit me. And I think I was just so surprised I didn’t- I mean I… she hit me again. Pretty hard-” Harry’s frown reached his eyes, ”And again, and again, and again. And I was too drunk to do anything, and then she just- she calmed down and realized what had just happened and started apologizing, and left to pour us some wine and I… I just remember getting out. Running a few blocks before calling Niall to get me, he got me out of there. He drove me straight to the ER and took me in for the night and looked after me. He told me to never contact her again.”

 

There were tears in Louis’ eyes. He was so besotted by Harry he could never understand. He didn’t know how on Earth could anyone ever strike Harry? Who would ever want to hurt him? Harry was the most innocent person Louis had ever had the honor to know. He just wanted to pamper Harry, wash his hair and drown him in kisses until he fell asleep in Louis’ arms.

 

But right now, Louis just gently took Harry’s hands into his own. Harry looked at Louis again and blinked a few times. Then he smiled and squeezed Louis’ hands.

 

”I’m sorry,” Louis said, barely audible.

 

”She wasn’t for me,” Harry smiled shyly and paused for a few seconds, ”But you are”.

 

Louis’ jaw dropped a little, and Harry’s smile grew. He didn’t know what to do, so he just nodded and smiled back, ”Yeah, I am for you.”

 

✿✿✿

 

The club was full of drunken dancing people, music blasting and colorful lights flickering. Louis tried to hold onto Harry’s hand, who was making their way up to the VIP booths. Nick Grimshaw had got them in and was now waving at them, at Harry, from the roomy booths. Louis was underage and had never been to a club before, but with Harry they didn’t even look at him twice.

 

Nick said something to the security guy and he let Harry and Louis pass. Nick was as tall and handsome as last time, his hair was on a quiff and his eyes sparkling for Harry. Louis felt a sting of jealousy when Harry hugged him tight and smiled. He said something to Nick and gestured towards Louis. The expression on Nick’s face turned from hesitant to polite recognition and he shook Louis’ hand smiling.

 

Then he led them to a booth where his friends were sitting. Liam was there, sitting close to a very beautiful woman. There was also a bit older guy named Ben and woman named Lou. Harry seemed to know them all and Louis just nodded and smiled shyly as they greeted him.

 

”So, Louis, how’d you and Harry here meet?” The woman beside Liam asked him, ”I’m Cheryl, by the way.” She had a thick accent and long eyelashes, her arm was wrapped around Liam’s waist.

 

”Oh, uh, hi Cheryl,” Louis just managed to smile, ”We, um, I work for Niall, actually, and uh… well Harry stopped by one day and, yeah.” Louis tried to seek support for his story from Harry, but he had already sunk into conversation with Nick. Starry-eyed, quiff-haired Nick who looked at Harry like he could kiss him at any moment now. Suddenly Louis had a feeling that this hadn’t been such a good idea after all.

 

Cheryl’s voice pulled his head back onto the surface, ”Oh, that’s nice. Do you like working there?” She was obviously trying to make polite conversation but Louis’ stomach was turning, he only nodded and mumbled something like ”yeah”. That was the end of that exchange.

 

The rest of the night they had drinks and talked about music and jobs and clothes and other clubs they had been to. Sometimes they tried to include Louis in their conversation, but of course he didn’t know anything about any of the topics on the table so he just agreed with the public opinion and continued being jealous over Nick and Harry, who also didn’t take part to the conversation.

 

A couple of hours into the night Nick’s hand was on Harry’s thigh and Louis had to excuse himself to go to the toilet, cause he felt like he was going to pass out. This was definitely _not_ the way he planned for this night to go. When he returned to their table, the twosome had parted just enough for Harry to ask if Louis was okay.

 

He just nodded and felt like a housewife trying to keep the parade going at the cost of his own feelings. So he swallowed it and smiled bravely, letting Harry have his fun while trying a little harder to socialize with the rest of the crew.

 

Another hour later Harry was ready to go, everyone at the club - including his friends - were pretty hammered. Saying goodbye to Nick, Louis might have seen Nick trying to kiss Harry, but Harry turning his cheek and smiling awkwardly at Nick. They left in silence.

 

Arriving at Harry’s place at Victoria, he pulled Louis to his side and whispered into his hair, ”I’m so proud of you love, I know hanging out with people you don’t know is hard. Sorry I wasn’t with you the whole time.”

 

Louis’ head was already boiling and Harry’s ignorance over the whole situation was infuriating, ”Whatever, I’m going to take a shower,” he just settled to say and was already heading towards the bathroom.

 

”Are you angry?” Harry asked carefully, leaning against his kitchen counter and crossing his harms on his chest. Louis had made it to the living room and was now debating whether to turn around and let Harry have it. Louis had thought of just pouting for the rest of the evening and then going to bed but, what the hell.

 

”Yeah, I am, you genius,” he spat out a little harsher than intended, and instead of sitting, he turned towards Harry to face him. He felt like an animal ready to attack: feet firmly on the ground, goosebumps and adrenaline running in his veins.

 

”Why?” Harry furrowed his eyebrows and let his arms loose on his sides. He didn’t make any effort to approach Louis and for once, unconsciously perhaps, was the underdog of this situation.

 

_”Why?_ You mean you _don’t know?_ God, Harry, how can you be so oblivious? You left me to hang out with _your friends_ for _three straight hours_ and that Grimshaw guy was hitting on you the whole evening! You’re so friendly you can’t say no and you just end up leading him on you twat!” Louis was so frustrated, Harry was his and his only. He abominated the man for trying to chat Harry up, how dared he?

 

Harry’s expression chilled by multiple degrees, ”Nick is my friend. And how could’ve he even known we’re together anyway?” His voice was cold and his face blank. Louis’ jaw dropped, was Harry implying that Louis wasn’t boyfriend-like? That he was too much of a _boy_ and not a _man_ to be with Harry?

 

”Meaning your ex-boyfriend, who apparently still has a thing for you. And what do you even mean by that? Would you rather have me clinging on to you every single minute of the day and introducing myself as your boyfriend, isn’t that your job you dimwit,” Louis narrowed his eyes and now it was his turn to cross his arms. He could fight Harry all night long if that’s what it took.

 

Harry blinked and looked at his feet, blushing. He shook his head, looking back at Louis, ”I just… I would like you to act more like my boyfriend so this wouldn’t be a problem.” His tone was challenging, and if there had been shame or fear in Harry’s eyes before, there wasn’t anymore - now there was just tiredness and anger.

 

”Oh? _Oh?_ You really have no shame, do you? You actually _like_ other people hitting on you because it makes you feel better about yourself, you’re even doing it now when you’re _in a relationship?_ Well guess what you fucking jerk, maybe I don’t want to be your fucking boyfriend anymore! Maybe you should date that fucking Nick what’s-his-name or someone your own fucking age and not a fucking naive child like me,” Louis practically shouted at Harry, whose expression went from outrage to surprise and then bewilderment.

 

Only then did Louis realize he had just maybe probably broken up with Harry, and he had to turn away, or else his own face would take all the ground from his words. Louis didn’t want to lose Harry, but his pride was holding him like a prisoner. He wanted to apologize, but absolutely couldn’t turn back now. So he just stared out the window to the city, which was bathing in the dim purple sunset light and already switching on its own lights.

 

The silence between them felt like an eternity, growing by the second. Louis bit his lip, but didn’t say anything, didn’t turn. He was building a wall between him and Harry and he knew it, it grew thicker from the silence. Invisible, inaudible, impermeable. He didn’t want it to end this way, he didn’t want it to end at all. But it would, of course it would, and that again, among a lot of other things, was Louis’ fault. He might as well just grab his jacket and leave.

 

He almost flinched, when Harry’s voice broke the wall, shattering, ”I could never do that,” his voice was barely audible, but it crawled up Louis’ spine as he jerked his head up, still facing the window. Louis turned to Harry slowly, like the whole room would’ve been filled with water.

 

Harry was taking steps towards Louis, as he repeated, emphasizing each word separately, ”I - could _never_ \- do that,” his face had gone white, and his features intensified. His pink lips stood out among his green eyes, dark hair and eyebrows. Louis blinked but didn’t look away. Harry stopped so far away from Louis, that even if they both stretched out their arms they probably wouldn’t touch.

 

Harry’s words were even slower than usual, ”If you don’t want to be my boyfriend anymore, then-” his lips were parted but no more words came out, he swallowed and his mouth narrowed to a thin line. He looked like he was holding back tears, as he blinked hard and looked at the ceiling.

 

Louis wasn’t in a much better state, to be honest. He didn’t know what to say or what to do. He felt hot and cold at the same time and his head was spinning. His legs were glued to the ground and his hands were tied up. His lungs were full of cement and his mouth was dry. He tried to tell Harry he didn’t mean it and that he really did want to be his boyfriend. He tried to yell that he didn’t want anything more than to be his boyfriend.

 

He knew that with every passing second he was quiet Harry was slipping further away. He tried to grasp him, he tried to grasp him so hard but he kept slipping away. Louis tried to catch him but it was like groping water. There was just one thing shouting in Louis’ brain, just one thing above all else, drowning everything else - all the thoughts he had ever had were covered by the one thing that replaced his every cell and deafened him from everything else.

 

Louis opened his mouth, but nothing came out, except an unwieldy outline of Harry’s name. Harry lifted his head and faced Louis. And they were both so helpless, so out of reach, slipping from each other and from everyone else. And then Harry gave him a broken nod, and took a step back. That was Louis’ final signal to move, to react. There was still only one thing spinning in his head and the last straw he could grasp onto. And he did, he grasped it tightly.

 

”I love you,” Louis felt like he was whispering and yelling at the same time, he didn’t know what it sounded like, or what he looked like, or what happened around them. Everything was blurry but Harry and the three words he had just spoken. The more they echoed in Louis’ head, the clearer they were, the more truthful.

 

Whereas Louis was completely frozen, Harry looked like he was feeling everything. The movements of the universe and the grass in the wind outside. He hadn’t turned away from Louis just yet, and now he was standing still eyes glimmering and lips parted. He nodded shakily and pressed his eyes closed, tears making their way across his cheeks. “Louis, you can’t say that unless you mean it.”

 

Louis felt himself unfreezing as he said it again. He realized he loved Harry, even if Harry didn’t love him back, even still he loved Harry and nothing could take that away from him. Louis closed the space between them and tiptoed to wrap his arms around Harry’s neck, ”I love you, I love you, I love you,” he chanted as he buried his head in Harry’s neck.

 

Harry fumbled Louis into his arms and grasped his shirt tightly. He smelled vaguely like cigarettes and sweat but also _Harry,_ ”Would you still want to be my boyfriend?” Louis heard him mumble and he tried to nod back.

 

”Yes, a thousand times yes,” Louis cried out and pressed his nose against Harry’s cheek. It felt warm and Louis laughed and cried at the same time. He felt like he was on fire.

 

”Good, ’cause you’re the love of my life,” Harry whispered and softly kissed Louis’ temple. Louis gasped and closed his eyes. ”My pretty boy,” Harry added and Louis swore he was the brightest flame in the city tonight. He had chills going up his spine, but he felt hot. He searched Harry’s lips with his mouth and kissed them over and over again, sucking on his tongue and biting his lip. It was wet and messy and perfect. And there they were, burning together.

 

✿✿✿

 

Louis put down the shopping bags on the couch so Cat wouldn’t sit in them and/or Goose wouldn’t eat them (learnt from experience). Harry made his way to the kitchen to make them some tea, and Louis’ attention fixed on the old bookcase standing next to the wall. That hadn’t been there before, right?

 

He made his way over, ”What’s all this stuff?” Louis ran his fingers over the backs of the books on the bookcase.

 

”Oh, um, just some stuff that was taking too much space back at Victoria,” Harry shrugged and came to stand next Louis, looking at the books, ”Fancy some tea?” He asked, turning his head to Louis.

 

”Yeah, thanks,” Louis smiled, and when Harry turned to get the kettle, carefully took a pink and white photo album from the shelf. He sat down in front of the bookshelf and opened it. The first few pages were filled with smiling people, who Louis didn’t recognize. Apparently it was Christmas: everyone was wearing something white or red, opening large christmas presents and laughing. The Christmas tree was huge and filled with beautiful decorations.

 

Louis felt a tiny sting of jealousy looking at those pictures. They hadn’t had a Christmas tree every year, and their Christmas decorations were very sad compared to the splendor of those pictures. Louis tried to push those feelings aside and focus on turning the page.

 

Then he saw something that made him blush - there was a picture of a young curly haired boy wearing a sparkly Christmas hat, holding a comprehensive watercolor palette to the camera. His braces caught the camera flash and his eyes were red, but his smile was wide and his eyes sparkling. There was a white canvas on the floor beside him.

 

Louis checked the year from the back of the album and counted Harry to be age 14 in the picture. Louis couldn’t stop staring at the picture, the didn’t dare to turn the page. 14-year-old Harry had Louis around his little finger.

 

He heard the present-Harry walking towards him and looked up. He had tied his hair on a bun and looked curiously at Louis.

 

”Oh no, I knew this day would come,” he said desperately, taking a seat next to Louis, who bursted out laughing. Harry just watched him, he tended to do that.

 

”But look at yourself, this is so adorable!” Louis praised and turned the album for Harry to see as well.

 

”No, please. I hoped you’d never find any of these,” Harry grinned and covered his eyes with his arm dramatically.

 

”Then why on Earth did you bring them here?” Louis laughed and shook his head.

 

”I hoped you wouldn’t be interested enough to ever open any of these,” Harry looked up at all the books and photo albums on the shelf.

 

”Of course I’m interested, it’s you!” Louis tried to hide his blush by looking back at the picture of Harry, ”Look at you, you’re so cute oh my god.”

 

Harry shook his head, ”That’s so awful, I mean look at me - my hair looks like a perm, my nose is huge and those braces, oh god.”

 

”How can you see yourself like that? So… flawed? This photo of you is so lovely,” Louis frowned, brushing his fingers across the picture.

 

He saw Harry shrug from the corner of his eye, ”I guess I just have many flaws.”

 

Louis looked up at Harry and blinked. Harry looked back at him, his eyes were so green, like a rainforest, ”Are they flaws if I’m in love with them?”

 

Harry’s jaw dropped just enough for Louis to notice. He blinked once, twice. He looked like he was about to say something, but then he closed his mouth before opening it again.

 

Louis got on his knees so that his face was a little higher than Harry’s, gently took his face in his hands and pressed his lips on Harry’s softly, kissing him slow. It was like the words Harry had been looking for, because he kissed Louis back, but with much more determination, much more passion.

 

”My pretty boy,” Harry whispered and Louis could feel his pupils dilating and his brain going fuzzy from the tingling in his body, making it’s way from his heart to his every limb. He was Harry’s pretty boy and that’s all he cared about.

 

✿✿✿

 

A year later Louis was jumping up and down the side of the football field, yelling cheers and instructions to the kids playing. The modest bleachers were packed with parents and siblings cheering for their little ones. It was the end of the season finales, the sun was shining and Louis’ YMCA team was playing for the finals. The score was 6-6 and there were five minutes left.

 

So there Louis was, running up and down the side of the field in his trackies, yelling stuff like ”Defense from the right!” and ”Take it, take it!” whereas Harry yelled things more like ”Careful!” and ”You can do it!” Nevertheless Louis couldn’t have been happier that Harry was by his side, even though he knew nothing of this sport.

 

Two minutes left, Louis and Harry both jumping on the edge of their feet, the ball traveling further and further away from the opponent’s goal and even closer to theirs. Harry yelling ”Go Leo, go!” as Leo ran to the ball and changed its course. Louis started running with the ball, shouting instructions to Leo, who had taken all the other players by surprise. He ran with the ball towards the opponent’s end, passing it to Emily, who did her super hyper kick, the goalkeeper having no chance.

 

A wave of cheers drowned Louis as he joined in, jumping towards Harry, who was already running to him, ”We won!” Louis jumped and waved his arms in the air. His expression was mirrored from Harry’s face, who picked Louis up and spun him around. Louis hugged Harry tight, drowning his head in Harry’s curls, laughing out loud. The sun was shining, a warm breeze was in the air. He heard words coming out of Harry’s mouth, but didn’t actually think about them before their meaning hit him.

 

Harry’s eyes were sparkling as he put Louis down, ”Wh– what?” Louis looked at Harry, but didn’t stop smiling. Suddenly he didn’t hear anything else but the words he partially read from Harry’s lips, ”Marry me,” Harry repeated. Louis exhaled and felt his knees getting weaker. Before he even realized, he was nodding like mad and saying ”yes” all over again. And Harry picked him up again and kissed him and the whole world was cheering for them.

 

✿ **Epilogue**

 

The weather was cloudy and chilly. The sleepy city opened up behind the massive windows and it stood there cold and unpleasantly charming. Bars were being cleaned, shops closed early, everyone unwilling to move. It was an average lazy autumn Sunday.

 

Louis was lying on their couch, browsing through people’s Snapchat stories. Niall had been clubbing with some friends apparently, Liam was traveling again with now pregnant Cheryl and Harry had a picture of Louis’ bum with it circled in red. Norah Jones was playing quietly on the background. Louis was wearing trackies and a white YSL t-shirt Harry had bought him for his first photoshoot with Liam. It felt like yesterday even though it had been almost four years already.

 

There was a slight noise as Harry came down the stairs wearing his skinny jeans, a horrendous shirt  and golden boots. His latest art collection had made it to an exhibit for the first time - Tate Britain, no less. Louis was very proud of his fiancé, and of himself too, for inspiring this entire collection. Harry was now heading to a radio interview about it: the opening night was next week, everyone who was anyone in the art circles would be there, and Louis would be there beside Harry.

 

Harry glanced at Louis and froze on the step, ”Oh my god,” he mumbled, staring at Louis looking like he was having some religious illumination. His green eyes were wide and his cherry lips parted. Then he started blinking and furrowed his eyebrows.

 

”Um… Harry? What is it? You okay?” Louis put his phone away and measured Harry’s slim figure with his eyes and tried to keep up with something he didn’t quite catch.

 

”You’re not the pretty one anymore,” Harry exhaled and didn’t move from where he was standing, in the middle of the staircase. The whole situation was kind of frozen - it was quiet and it felt like the air didn’t move at all.

 

”Excuse me?” Louis made a facial expression implying that Harry had crossed some sort of a line and Louis was upset about it. What did he mean ”not pretty”? Louis was quite sure he was one of the prettiest.

 

”I mean-” Harry took a few steps down and stopped again. He shook his head but didn’t take his eyes off of Louis, ”You’ll always be my pretty boy but… look at you, you’re fucking hot.”

 

Louis’ jaw dropped, he blinked and his eyes were following Harry, who finally walked down the stairs and to Louis. He sat down next to him and brushed through Louis’ hair with his fingers, ”Oh my god,” he repeated and gently caressed Louis’ stubble, it was like Harry saw Louis for the first time.

 

Louis’ heart was racing, he wanted to kiss Harry. He always wanted to kiss Harry, but somehow this conversation had increased his desires to do so. He had actually never considered himself anything else than Harry’s pretty boy, but now… now he felt alive.

 

He softly grabbed Harry’s wrist and moved it away to lean forward. Harry met him halfway, pulling Louis into his lap. Louis felt a rush of want want want and whined into Harry’s mouth. It was intense - Louis grinding onto Harry and Harry grabbing his bum. Louis started kissing his neck, before Harry sighed that he should really be going already. Louis didn’t want to be unfair so he let go with reluctance.

 

”Can you do my hair?” Harry whispered into Louis’ neck and he nodded in return. They were both trying to ease their breath. Louis looked at the comb and the hairspray Harry had brought down with him.

 

Louis sat up on his knees on the sofa and Harry turned his back on him. Louis took the comb and started brushing through Harry’s curls gently, ”What’re we having today?” he asked. This had become almost a tradition.

 

”I dunno… I was thinking lil’ braids on both sides going into the bun yeah?” Harry chewed on his lip. He was completely helpless with his hair, Louis was thinking of hiring a specialist for this.

 

”Right, you know you should really learn how to fix your hair yourself,” Louis reminded him, although he really loved braiding Harry’s hair.

 

”Yeah yeah I know,” Harry sighed as Louis did a ponytail on him, leaving two strands of hair on both sides and started braiding them into the ponytail, which he would fix into a bun later.

 

”Have you thought about what you’re gonna wear to the opening?” Louis asked and was going through his own closet in his mind, trying to match different pants with shirts and jackets.

 

”Yeah I thought about the Chanel suit we saw earlier,” Harry answered and Louis shook his head.

 

”You mean the one that looks like an ice cream cone? None of that, I can’t have you not living up to your last name, Styles,” Louis gently pulled the other braid before attaching it to the ponytail.

 

”Heeey, don’t be mean, I like that suit thank you very much,” Harry frowned, trying to act offended. That only made Louis laugh and peck a kiss on Harry’s cheek.

 

”Okay, tell you what, if you like that suit, you wear it okay babe?” Louis spun the ponytail into a bun and combed all the spare strands of hair back. Harry sighed.

 

”You’re amazing and I love you and I’m glad to be calling you my fiancé,” he said and Louis’ hand stopped. He blinked a few times before putting the comb back onto the table and picking up the hairspray.

 

”Love you too babe,” he said as in a question and sprayed Harry’s hair from the problematic parts. ”All done,” he said, kissing the top of Harry’s head gently and put the hairspray next to the comb.

 

”Thanks,” Harry said and turned to Louis, who had returned to a more comfortable sitting position, ”I dunno what I’d do without you.”

 

”Well, you have a radio interview without me, so that’s a start,” Louis smiled at Harry and took his hand. Harry’s eyes were super green as always and his white teeth bit his purple tinted lips. Louis was as in love as always.

 

”Thank you for always fixing my hair, and for a whole bunch of other stuff, too,” Harry blushed a little but didn’t look away, ”You’re the best fiancé I could ever have asked for,” he rubbed Louis’ hand with his long fingers and it was quiet for a bit, ”Also you’ve grown up to be pretty hot, so there’s that.”

 

Louis chuckled but didn’t know what to say so he just nodded, ”Thanks to you too, I’m not much with speeches but I love you very very much,” he smiled and squeezed Harry’s hand before leaning into a gentle kiss.

 

They were a total match. Louis knew what he would wear to the opening.

 

✿✿✿

**Author's Note:**

> sorry for all the clichés I just love being extra


End file.
